Balancing Life

As many of you know, I have been working on a time management solutions mini-course to help people bring their lives back into balance. I announced this effort about a month ago. I am very excited to announce that the ‘Time to Change’ mini-course videos are complete. There are 15 videos in all. The individual videos are brief, all less than 10 minutes, some less than 5 minutes. Collectively these 15 videos contain over an hour and a half of instruction. I am in the process of having all of the videos transcribed. Transcripts and audio will be available for those of you who would prefer to read or listen. I want to tell you a bit about what is in the course, but before doing so I want to share with you why I am doing this.
 

Why I am offering time management solutions on a blog about discipleship

People’s lives are chaotically out of balance. I see numerous people stressed and overcommitted to the point that God is crowded out of (or at least to the edge of) their lives. This is a huge spiritual problem. I think it is very hard to serve God excellently and honor Christ fully if you are stressed, fatigued, disorganized, and unfocused. I know that has been true for me. Furthermore, all the spiritual disciplines in the world are not going to help you grow in your relationship with God, if you don’t have time to use them. I am hoping that the ‘Time to Change’ mini-series can both free up time and alleviate stress so that people can be more fully available to God and their families.
 

So What’s in the Course?

I gathered together all of the ‘best of the best’ time management solutions that I have personally used and therefore know work. I have not only included time management solutions, but lots of tips to help you declutter your life and reduce stress. For example, lesson 8 deals with eliminating what I call ‘irritants’. Irritants are those incomplete tasks that you know you should do, but never seem to get to. Irritants are silent sources of stress and drain energy. In lesson 8 you learn how to rapidly eliminate unfinished tasks. In the last 30 days, I have knocked out 11 of 25 unfinished tasks that have been stressing me for months. I explain exactly how I did it in the video. Or for another example, Have you ever wished you were better at saying, “no”? Lesson 11 explores common reasons people say ‘yes’ when they really don’t want to. In lesson 11 you learn why you should give yourself permission to say no and how to do it. These are just a couple of examples of the numerous topics addressed in the 15 videos.
 

How to get the lessons?

Sign-up using the box below or the box in the right side bar. This sign-up is distinct from a normal subscription to The Practical Disciple. I will not be posting the lessons as normal posts. The only way to receive them is to sign-up specifically for the ‘Time to Change’ mini-course. Once you have entered your name and email address you will be sent a brief email to confirm your request.
 

Below is a list of the 15 topics that are currently in the series.

• Lesson 1–The Big Five: Creating a Workable To-Do List.
• Lesson 2–Interruptions: Eliminating and Managing Interruptions to Increase Productivity
• Lesson 3– Scheduling: Creating Priority and Margin
• Lesson 4–Living in Ideal Time vs. Idealized Time
• Lesson 5–Eliminating Clutter One Bag at a Time
• Lesson 6–Ordering Clutter with the 10 Minute Tidy and TRAF.
• Lesson 7–Sabbath Basics: Establishing a Pattern for Rest and Holiness
• Lesson 8–Irritants: Ruthlessly Eliminating Unfinished Tasks
• Lesson 9– Goals: Goal Setting Basics
• Lesson 1o–Evaluate: The Importance of a Daily Inventory
• Lesson 11–How to Say No
• Lesson 12–Batch Processing for Greater Efficiency
• Lesson 13–The Chore Deck, an Almost Effortless System for Keeping a Clean House
• Lesson 14–Keeping it Altogether with a Planner
• Lesson 15–Establishing and Repeating a Weekly System

 
The lessons will be released beginning Wednesday, September 15th. You will receive a new lesson every other day for thirty days.  Blessings to you as you seek to establish a more Godly rhythm to life.
 

 

“When I survey people about what is the hardest thing about prayer two core issues repeatedly come up: Finding the time, staying focused.”

Now over 3 years and 250 posts later, my sense is that people are struggling more than ever to find time and focus.  May be it’s the constant interruptabilty that cell phones and texting have brought into our lives.  May be it is the constant conditioning of our minds by commercial breaks every 7 minutes and youtube videos that all must be under 10 mins. May be it is our constant groping for newness and entertainment.  Frankly, I don’t care what the cause is, but I am growing desperately concerned by the effect.
 
I recently ran a beta test of an online Bible mentoring program.  Three college students volunteered to go through it as I created it on the fly.  I sent them weekly learning modules that were a combination of text, video and audio units.  All the tools I gave them where tools I have personally used and from which I have benefited.  The units were not demandingly large and people were encouraged to work at whatever pace they could.  Nevertheless, everyone struggled with time and all three cited this as a concern from the beginning.  These are three highly motivated, bright, and successful young people.  What they could get out of the course was extremely limited because of the excessively demanding and, at times, draining lifestyle they were experiencing.  When I asked one what I could have changed about the course that would have made it better for her, she said, “Nothing.  Not unless you could change my life.  That’s the only thing that could have made a difference.  I just can’t do it right now because of the place I am in.”
 
So, I started thinking…I have got to figure out how to help people make time and un-hurry their lives if I want to help them grow in Christ.  And, that is exactly what I am doing.  I am in the process right now of creating a mini-course called “Time to Change.”  I have diligently been researching and applying tools and strategies to maximize the use of my time and weed out what is superfluous so I have time for what is most important in my life.  Guess what…the strategies are working.  Slowly but surely, I am reclaiming ground to pray, exercise, hang out with youth, play music, enjoy my family, get adequate sleep and more fully serve God.  I am loving it and want to share the joy and these secrets of exceptional living.  I call it “exceptional living” because the norm that I am seeing around me is hurry, scurry, stress, and yearning for something better.  Enough of that garbage.
 
God’s desire for us is abundant life, not abundant busyness.  He gave us, “a spirit not of timidity but of power, love, and self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7.  We simply need to live into it, but honestly, who has time to change.  I am inviting your prayers for me as I draft this mini-course.  I will keep you updated and make it available as soon as possible.
 
I would also love to hear your favorite tools or strategies for harnessing sanity in your life. If you don’t have any, then feel free to share you biggest struggle when it comes to managing time and being productive. I would really love to help people reclaim some time turf for God.
 
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For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

 
Last night I was watching a video with my son Matthew that was part of an online course we are taking together. It is a course in developing online products. The instructor actually gives away a number of products to participants in the course. They are completely free to reproduce them and put them online. In the video the instructor was addressing the concern that if he gives the products away won’t the market then be flooded to the point that his students can’t realistically compete. The short answer was no. Mainly because he explained that the sad reality is that 99% of the people who take a course fail to do the work necessary.
 
I was reminded of a real estate agent I met who was extremely profitable at what he did. A young competitor called him up one day and said, “I know that you probably won’t want to do this, but I was wondering if there is anyway you would meet with me for lunch and share with me what you do that makes you so successful.” The agent agreed without hesitation. He went and he shared the many personal disciplines that he regularly exercised to succeed so well. Afterwards, the young competitor said, “I still can’t believe you where willing to do this. Why did you do this? Aren’t you afraid I’ll take your business?” The agent explained to him, “I am really not worried about that. Very few people are willing to do what I do to be successful.”
 
Unfortunately, I can relate all to well to these stories in my spiritual life, both as a mentor and a student. I can’t tell you how many books, retreats, sermons, cd’s, videos, and classes I have sat through that gave me clear direction that would benefit my spiritual life. Yet, finding myself applying far to little. I also have seen this in the church regularly. I repeatedly hand people spiritual disciplines in kit form, but sadly only a very limited number apply tools long enough to see the fruit.
 
My concern around this very human reality is heavily on my mind as I try to re-craft an online bible mentoring program that people will actually hopefully apply themselves to. I am not trying to sound dismal and skeptical here. The harsh reality though is that we are conditioned daily to crave newness and immediate gratification which are both antithetical to the self-discipline necessary to develop depth in any discipline.
 
I have noticed that whether you are talking about sports, academics, finances, business, or spiritual growth, the people who excel have tremendous personal discipline. They share some common characteristics and practices. Highly successful and disciplined people:
 
PLAN THEIR WORK
Disciplined people have clear plans for what they will do. Clear to-do lists for the day. Journals for their prayers. Stated or written intentions and goals. Do you consciously have any plan for how you are growing in your relationship with God. Do you have a plan for improving your study of the Word or prayer life? Do you have a plan for what you will give in money, time or talent? Do you have a hope or vision for how you will be different as a disciple in six months? If so, do you know what specifically you are going to do to get there? You cannot expect to arrive somewhere, if you have no destination in mind or no plan to get there.
Application step: Write a description of how you would like to be different as a disciple in the next six months or write down an accomplishment that you would like to achieve to honor God. Make a list of the steps you need to take to transform these hopes into realities.
 
WORK THEIR PLAN.
The greatest intention in the world without action is worthless. Once you craft a plan, work it. Work it without fail, not just when it is convenient. I have noticed disciplined people stick to their plan to completion. They do not keep willy-nilly jumping to a new idea or plan. I actually recently heard discipline defined as “not changing course unless a different choice brings you closer to your destination.” Stay focused on taking action daily and consistently. No matter how small a step you take, take a step.
Application step: Track your progress. Create charts, checklists or other visible reminders that reflect your progress. For example, on the corner of my bathroom mirror I have written the following with a dry erase marker: “Blog Posts–41/210.” I have a goal of writing 210 posts in 2010. The first number is my current count of posts year to date. I update it each time I produce a new posts. It stares me in the face every time I stand at my sink. I have several other goals similarly tracked on my mirror. Notebooks can be another great way to track progress. My son and I have a notebook for tracking our progress in a joint venture. We print out lists of actions steps. We then check off and date when we accomplish them.
 
DO NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS
This principle goes hand-in-hand with working a plan. I have often voiced it this way, “Don’t work ahead and don’t make an exception.” This principle is really a principle of boundaries. Disciplined people resist distraction. How often do you put together a to-do list and then later you find that you spent hours doing other things with limited progress on your actual list. This may be symptomatic of a lack of self-discipline around staying focused. Or you may be grabbing at other solutions before applying something long enough to see its fruit. Keep on your plan. Discipline also draws boundaries on working excessively to the point of burn-out. A lack of rest is a lack of discipline. I am discovering more and more that fatigue debilitates discipline faster than any other factor in my life.
Application step: Define the upper and lower boundaries for the activity you will put into a discipline and stick with those boundaries. At first this will very likely induce stress, but over time it will extremely reduce stress.
 
ATTENTION TO THE DETAILS
Disciplined people think and plan fully through things. They don’t half do a task. As Christians we are supposed to do all that we do as if we are doing it for Christ. Doesn’t it follow that we should do all things excellently? Doesn’t it follow that we shouldn’t be sloppy or disorganized about how we approach our spiritual disciplines?
Application step: Go back and evaluate your plan. Is it specific and thoughtful or have you just thrown a loose idea out there? What if someone else had to follow it? Could they follow it clearly?
 
KNOW THEIR PURPOSE
It’s one thing to have a destination in mind and even a plan for getting there, and it is an entirely different thing to understanding why you are going there. Disciplined people don’t only know what they are doing but they understand why they are doing it. This clarity of purpose is partly what allows disciplined people an edge in accomplishing their plans. When the going gets tough, they can remind themselves of the importance of the activity they are doing.
Application step: Look at your plan and write down why you want to succeed. What is your motivation? What will be accomplished ultimately?
 
—————

EXERCISES THAT WILL STRENGTHEN PERSONAL DISCIPLINE
 
Fasting
Fasting from anything that matters to you will increase your baseline ability to practice discipline in all things. You don’t have to just fast from food. Give up something for a period of time that is significant to you or reflexive, i.e. spending time on facebook, watching television, texting, etc. A life coach that I know says, “The way we do one thing is the way we do all things.” There is a lot truth to that statement. The good news is that if we shift significantly how we do one thing it can effect how we do all things. So, discipline around how you eat will translate into greater discipline in how you study.
 
Pick a single activity each day and perform it with extreme excellence.
For example, next time you iron a shirt, do it very meticulously. Or next time you have to clean something, clean it until it is absolutely spotless. Actively working at attention to detail on a task will shift your awareness around detail in other tasks.
 
Practice waking and rising at the same time each day.
This is something that I have a particularly difficult time with, so I may be preaching mostly to myself. Nevertheless, there are two important reasons why you should do this. You will develop your ability to exercise placing boundaries which are critical to discipline. You will also dismantle fatigue in your life. Fatigue causes you to cut corners and compromises your judgement.
 
Use a timer on activities you easily get lost in and quit when it goes off.
I can get lost in activities all to easily. Some people set time boundaries more naturally than others. Using and obeying a timer will help expand your ability to set healthy limits. I used a timer twice this morning in the office. I spent 15 minutes “T.R.A.F.ing” (toss, refer, act, or file) in my offices and 20 minutes reading a magazine on children’s ministry. I knew that both of them were things that I could easily let consume much time so I set a timer. When my office gets out of control, I traf daily for just a few minutes at a time until it is restored to order. I set my timer and do nothing more and nothing less.
 
Maintain a Sabbath
A sabbath is a discipline in and of itself but I find the practice of it effects my ability to be disciplined. You need time for quiet reflection or you will become very muddied in your purpose and find yourself pulled about by every demand that comes your way. I am in the process of reestablishing a Sabbath time. I used to take half of every Monday and use it to wander in the woods for a couple of hours and then I would sit in prayer at the edge of a pond for an entire hour of uninterrupted prayer. When I maintain a day of rest like this my ability to be disciplined sores.  To learn the basics of sabbath read my sabbath post.
 
Practice stillness
Few things will awaken self-awareness like stillness and self-awareness is key to self-discipline. When we lack awareness we are reactionary. If you practice stillness, you will become much more conscious of thoughts and feelings going on inside of you. You increase your ability through stillness to observe thoughts and feelings and either respond to or disregard them. Sitting quietly observing nature and paying attention to my senses for lengthy periods of time has been particularly beneficial in this regard. Centering prayer though has been incomparable to any other activity in honing my ability to stay focused and not get jerked about by thoughts, feelings, and physical distractions. If you are unfamiliar with this practice then check out my centering prayer post.
 
Pray for self-discipline
Did you notice in the opening quote from the bible that Paul is telling us that a spirit of discipline or self-control is something God gave you. You can work on all the things above and it will help, but don’t forget to ask God to fill you with his Holy Spirit to keep the flesh in check and your spirit faithful.
 
Blessing to you as you seek greater faithfulness to God in all things.
  

So what do I mean by eliminating déjà vu?

I am horrifically bad about handling things like email, snail mail, and paper over and over again.  I skim mail and say, “I’ll deal with that later.”  I can find myself reading and rereading emails multiple times, just because I fail to act upon them or purge them immediately.  Then one day something snaps.  I realize I have something like 2500 emails just hanging out in my inbox and can’t stand it.  The result… I spend a marathon session of email purging.  It is a rather energy depleting task; particularly, if I find something I really should have acted upon weeks ago.  Nevertheless, it must be done, but couldn’t it be done differently.  The answer is a resounding, “YES.”

Each email quietly makes a slight demand on me.  But let’s face it, there are really only three things you can do with a piece of mail, toss it, refer it, or act on it. I have grown tired of the subtle constant tug of unprocessed mail. I am nowworking very hard at a “handle something only once” policy.  It used to be that physical clutter sucked away my energy and attention from God.  Now, can you believe it?  I have virtual clutter too!  Not only am I trying to handling things only once, but I am opting out of email lists to eliminate mail before it is even sent.

I am beginning to feel some effects of the shift.  I am having far less, “Haven’t I opened this email before?” moments.  Praise God.  I think I will praise God now that I have a little bit more time.  What about you?  Is virtual clutter needlessly draining your time and energy?  Do you cling to old email or snail mail only to find yourself handling it multiple times?  Join me in eliminating déjà vu, by committing to only handling things once.  I am sure you won’t regret it.

TO THOSE WITH SMALL FREEZERS

1)  Bulk shop for non-perishables. The beauty of freezer cooking is batch producing what you need done so you radically reduce shopping, prepping, clean-up and time spent on decisions around all of those things.  You can apply that same spirit to non-perishables and have some of the same benefits.

2) Freezer cook but just on a much smaller scale. Nothing says you have to do a dozen meals at once.  Just think of the time you would save if you even just did a double batch of something from time to time.  Two days ago, I needed to brown a pound of ground beef.  I instead browned two and then packaged and froze one.  I won’t need to do it the next time.

3) Focus on soups, stews, and chili. When you place them in a one gallon bag and freeze them flat they take amazingly little space, reheat well, and are healthy.

4)  Consider buying a small chest freezer. You can get a decent size one brand new for $150 or less.  You can find them for even less in the classified ads.  Put the word out that you are looking for one.  An older person who is downsizing might give you one for free or very reasonable.  If you use it wisely, it will pay for itself easily.

TO SINGLES AND SMALL FAMILIES

1)  Consider making a casserole recipe but dividing it into smaller servings, perhaps, even individual servings.

2)  Partner up with someone. Considering having a cooking day and sharing a meal once a week or once every couple weeks with someone else.  I found in college that sometimes cooking for one is much harder than cooking for four.

I welcome other suggestions.  Blessings to you as you strive for greater stewardship and a more peaceful life.

Another is to create a specific time and don’t over look space for prayer. Commit for a couple of weeks to praying every day in a particular spot at a particular time. Over time, the spot becomes a trigger to help you get in a prayerful mindset. It also, gives you some privacy so that you can limit interruption and/or distractions.

I find that when I am really struggling for focus, I need something as a guide to physically pull me back into focusing. There are a host of guides out there as printed devotional guides or use a prayer model like A.C.T.S.–Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and Supplication. A prayer guide not only gets you focused, but it also tends to expand your prayer vocabulary by prompting you to pray about people and issues you would never consider.

So if your struggling for time and focus these are just a few hints to get you started. Blessings!